I
am very excited about reading The Gift of Failure by Jessica
Lahey. Why? Because it challenges how I teach and how I parent.
Also, some of the ideas in the book reinforces some of those ideas I already
have about teaching and parenting...
IDEAS
THAT CHALLENGE ME:
In
Chapter One Lahey builds the ground work for understanding where American
parents may have gotten it wrong in their understanding of child
rearing.
But,
before I explore some ideas that challenged me, some of Lahey's historical
information was very interesting. She cites John Locke and Thomas Paine
as early pioneers in child rearing....Yes, the same men we associate with
government philosophy and political hell raising. As a student and teacher of
government I thought this was interesting.
MOVING
ON: One idea Lahey explored was popular in the 70s and 80s was known as
"attachment parenting." This parental philosophy believed
"children should be in a sling 24/7", always near the parent.
Lahey explained this was the outgrowth of the need for a strong bond between
the parent and the child. Some feared the lack of bonding would create
an unstable child, and thus an unstable adult. These fears, as Lahey
pointed out, were reinforced in news programs showing neglected children in over
crowed, neglected Romanian orphanages form this time. Also, guilt helped reinforce these
notions, as more women entered the workforce and found less time to be with
their children.
This
idea did not challenged my ideas, for I knew of some parents who believed in
this philosophy. Instead this challenged the reality of my life as
child. Being that my mother was raising five children without a husband
in the 70s. In 1972, my father died in a car accident and my mother was
thrown into the workforce after staying home many years raise us. My
mother, who never graduated from high school, worked many different types of
jobs, during all times of the day or night. So, she had no way she could
keep up us in a "sling."
This
being the case, might this explain why I am so different from my peers and my
outlook upon life...
THE
"NO DUH" IDEAS:
There
were many in Chapter One. So many, I will simply list them:
- American based their parental actions based upon what
made them feel good, and not what was best for their
child. Need I say anything more about this?
- Parents trying to be a "friend" to their
child. Wait, I don't want a friend who is twenty years younger than
me. If I do, there is something wrong with me...
- The biggest "NO DUH" - "..parents who
out a priority on saving kids from frustration and teachers who put a
priority on challenging their students often butt heads, and consequently,
the parent-teacher partnership had reached a breaking point." I have
experience this so many times as a teacher.
This
being said, I could see time when parents might need to step in. Also,
there might be personal "hang ups" a parent might have about certain
things. And, these "hang ups"might give parents justification
to bail a child out. Tell me what you think?
More
posts are to come as I continued reading this very interesting book!
BY
THE WAY: Looking for some SUPER social studies actives, lessons, video notes,
task cards, and so much more, visit my store: SOCIAL STUDIES SUPER STORE.
